1. Libra
You are pure and beautiful angels. You were born with original sin and it is still your only sin. You are innocent, sometimes angels ask you for advice. Even the Saints said, “Okay, I hear you—you’re right—but maybe you should tone it down, because you make everybody feel guilty.” You have to wear heavy boots just to avoid floating up to heaven.
2. Taurus
You have a forgiving heart and do not hold grudges. Everyone calls you sweetheart. He helps little old ladies walk across the street, rescue cats from trees, and catch children as they fall from burning buildings. Your only fault is that sometimes you’re too good for your own good—and in a world full of devils, that can be dangerous.
3. Pisces
You have your rules of conduct, and you stick to them in the end. You are kind, caring, forgiving and compassionate. Your only fault is a tendency to get a little angry when people don’t return your kindness and generosity. But you are faster than that because you realize that life is too short to let the haters upset you.
4. Sagittarius
Loving others comes as easily to you as breathing. You walk through this life with a smile on your face and a song in your heart. He enjoys being around people and especially making them laugh. To you, the truth is beautiful, and you only slip when people lie—and a little bit of the Devil comes out of you. But you never feel bad and make your situation worse—you feel the white hot heat of anger for a moment and then you let it go.
5. Aquarius
As a water bearer, your greatest virtue is a seemingly endless willingness to do good for others. He loves the joy of bringing happiness to others. You are loyal and loving and kind. But you have the power to sometimes make you make unwise decisions.
6. Gemini
Yes you will be ranked in the middle. You are the classic example of someone who always has an angel on one shoulder and a demon on the other, vying for your attention. Whether you choose to act like an angel or a devil depends a lot on your mood and what you ate in the morning. You are like night and day, good and bad, summer and winter all wrapped up in the same frustrating web of contradictions.
7. Leo
Lions are majestic and powerful and beautiful and majestic—until you get on their bad side. This is when you flash your scary teeth and let out a roar. You like to do good deeds until someone crosses your path – and you make sure you regret it for the rest of your life.
8. Cancer
You sincerely desire to be a good person—that life presents many trials, and it is difficult for you to resist them. Your typical day includes taking your nephew to school, yoga class, visiting your aunt in the hospital, and then a four-hour hookup with that hot Tinder guy. It is your sincere hope that God will forgive you more—because he will need you.
9. Virgo
He is warm, funny, generous, and very likable. You are also corrected in your many desires. And he has a straight line ten miles long. If someone is foolish enough to be on your bad side, you will seek revenge and will not rest until you humiliate your opponent. But other than that, like I said, he’s very likable.
10. Aries
You have so many bad habits, a member of the local Vice Squad is assigned to handle your case. Whether it’s drinking, lying, cheating, double-crossing, cheating, or backstabbing, you’ve got it covered like a professional. Your redeeming value is your big laugh—you like to make people laugh before messing with them.
11. Capricorn
There’s a reason the Devil is often depicted as a goat’s head in paintings—it’s because the Devil is you. You voluntarily uploaded that photo. You don’t want to do good, because that’s what they suck at. You’ll do bad things until you get caught, then pretend you’re sorry. Sometimes you even find yourself belonging to others—but not often, because you are usually guilty.
12. Scorpio
Even Satan checks your calls because he doesn’t want you to yell at him. There are seven levels of hell, but you have a luxury condo tucked under them all. He is the living embodiment of evil—but what a body! Your request is so powerful, it might bring the Pope to his knees, asking for a taste.
