We need more personality in email, especially in unsubscribing

Is empathy, compassion and humanity bad now? That’s what I hear from thought leaders and government officials who say we can no longer be so soft. I couldn’t disagree more, and I urge my fellow marketers not to abandon these standards.

The COVID-19 pandemic has shown us just how important it is. With the upheavals we face every day, I believe it is more important than ever to use these human qualities.

If you ignore it, you’re also taking away the biggest power of email: building a one-on-one connection in that most personal space — the email inbox. We have to show our customers that we know and understand their needs and desires.

The most obvious point of contact comes in the email message itself, but it’s not the only place where we can show our customers some care and consideration.

This article will be a little different from the norm, and I hope you will play along. I often come to you with fully developed advice or comments on email problems that we marketers face. Today, I’m doing research on an idea that came to me as I traced the digital trails my father and uncle left behind after they died within weeks of each other last summer.

What it taught me is to unsubscribe

As part of my duties as the executor of both of these cases, I had to clean out their email inboxes to make organizing easier. I would have done what most people do – delete all messages and close the accounts.

I didn’t do that because I needed to get and process bills and close or switch accounts, so I scoured every inbox and unsubscribed from every email list I could find.

During that process, I encountered a number of unsubscribe flows. Others are working. A surprising number did not, especially those of the big names. I encountered too many 404 pages. By the end of my career, I understood why some frustrated subscribers didn’t even bother to unsubscribe.

(Note: Before you read any further, check your unsubscribe process to make sure it works. The law, and you owe it to your subscribers and the integrity and security of your email system to make sure these important automations are working properly.)

I also learned that many brands don’t seem to care why I unlisted them. It was just me clicking the unsubscribe button, maybe confirming the request on the website and then, boom. I was gone.

That’s such a waste. We can learn a lot from those who unsubscribe. These are people who care enough to opt out instead of clicking the “report spam” button. They don’t let emails pile up and delete them without reading them.

We ignore sensitive information. What broke the relationship?

Some companies gave me a standard checklist of reasons to unsubscribe (none included the “death” version). If the product offers an open “Other” option, check it by typing “This person is dead” or “Subscriber is dead.”

So far, no brands have responded to those messages. Maybe no one is monitoring that box, or they don’t register that someone has unsubscribed for that reason.

That leads me to this question: Should we do more to detect when someone closes an account or unsubscribes because the account owner is dead?

I haven’t concluded anything yet. That’s why I throw the following questions out to you in the wide world of emails:

• Should we create an automatic response to such comments via sympathy email?
• Is that something we can measure?
• What would be the value of our product?
• Is it the right thing to do?
• We’ve been talking about brands and what it’s important to be human and empathetic in our customer relationships. Is this one of the solutions?

I will start the discussion here. Feel free to let me know what you think on social media.

Email marketing always means a relationship between a brand and a subscriber. Yes, it’s a commercial relationship. But many companies that are showing growth and a good return on investment don’t treat email as just another ad, circular or sales pitch. They demonstrate the principles I mentioned above: empathy, compassion and humanity.

Does it make sense?

Don’t you agree? How do those birthday emails work?

Email builds relationships because it reaches customers in the inbox. I get those messages in the same inbox where I get my personal letters, bills, notifications and high school reunion updates.

From a brand’s point of view, acknowledging customer lifestyle changes makes sense because it recognizes that unsubscribes are sticking to their end of the value proposition – opting out instead of leaving their email addresses or hitting “report spam.”

For brands, there’s something to be gained by taking a second to say, “We’re sorry for your loss. We’ll make sure you unsubscribe and never receive any more emails from us.” That assurance, if I could get it even once, would be nice.

Now, what is the value of the product? It conveys your sensitivity to another person. But can it affect adoption?

This is why I ask that: My father was an avid golfer. He and I always played together. In my quest to unsubscribe, I discovered new golf sites. Now I subscribe to them. (Thank you, Father!)

No, I’m not suggesting this be a KPI. That is the only compassion that can have a negative impact.

A “We’re sorry” email can be a catch-all trick. But it’s just as important as the human mind that you apologize and show empathy. You probably won’t get many new subscribers this way. But if you do, they can be valuable.

Who is doing it now?

I don’t have any examples of brands responding to unsubscribers instead of email subscribers, but here are two products that understand the same task. Is it a coincidence that they are both related to pets?

Chewy comes to mind first. The ecommerce pet supply brand has earned virtual millions from word-of-mouth exposure for its customer service and appreciation. Our response to customers with dead pets has become legendary in the ecommerce world.

Among the actions customers reported on social media, Chewy sent sympathy flowers and handwritten cards to customers who canceled their Autoship subscriptions or contacted the brand about returning goods after their pets died. The brand also issued refunds and encouraged customers to donate unused food and other supplies to animal shelters.

The company would say, “Sure, give it back. Here’s a prepaid label. Sorry for your loss.” But they know their numbers and the benefits of being compassionate and humane.

Petplan is a UK pet insurance brand that has mastered the art of humane copywriting. Its messages recognize how the pet owner feels when filing a claim. They are a model of business communication that includes actionable information with real insight.

Here is an email sent to a customer who filed a claim after their pet died:

• “We are saddened to hear that Maisie has passed away. We know this must be a difficult time for you and we would like to help if we can.
• “If you need to talk to someone who understands your loss, we’ve found that the Blue Cross Bereavement Service can help – so please give them a call. [XXXX-XXX-XXXX]. Sometimes, just listening can make a big difference.
• “We wanted to inform you that you will soon receive a refund of £97.63 due to changes to your policy XXXXXXX.
• “We have sent the payment to your bank account holding XXXX, which will reach you within the next three working days.
• “If you have any questions, you can always speak to our dedicated Customer Service Team by using our web chat or by calling XXXXXXXX. They would be more than happy to help.”

You use data you have, such as a pet’s name, to personalize the message and write the message as if it were a note to a friend. That one data field made all the difference.

Yes, both of these emails are sent to paying customers, not just emailing customers who may or may not have purchased during their cycle with your product. But they show what’s possible with a little more thought.

These human expressions make a difference, especially when they are unexpected.

How can we do this?

Perhaps this is a borderline case. Maybe people delete emails every day and move on. If they don’t give us a reason to unsubscribe, we won’t be able to reach them, and that’s fine. But what if consumers provide that information? Isn’t it our responsibility to admit it?

It’s easy to lose our sense of humanity in digital marketing, where we can’t meet face-to-face with any of our customers. During the time of COVID-19, we learned about the importance of authenticity, humanity and compassion. Can we apply what we have learned to personal difficulties?

As I write this, I’m starting to think that brands should consider taking action, giving an endorsement, or giving a guarantee in this particular situation.

Now, how could we make this happen? Let’s look at the answer. It can happen if someone adds a reason to your message reply. Your ESP should be able to find keywords like “dead,” “dead,” “dead” or “dead.” Unless you use “no reply,” in which case you can go straight to email jail.

Ask your ESP if you can capture those words in your response management and automate the message from that capture.

Unsubscribe time is human time

Of course, the person has just unsubscribed, so sending them an email is usually unlimited. But at least in the US, CAN-SPAM gives you seven days to process an unsubscribe, so your single acknowledgment will be covered under that timeline. You are not selling anything or asking them to do something.

Let’s talk about coming into our own selves as marketers and as people and see if we can be our subscribers instead of just making money off of them.