(December 22 – January 19)
He is impulsive, volatile, and loose. Sometimes you are reckless. He echoes the sentiment of Mark Twain’s famous quote: “If you don’t like the weather in New England right now, wait five minutes.” If someone doesn’t like your mood or ideas right now, all they have to do is wait five minutes. Since you think there’s no need to make the bed if you’re going to sleep in it again tonight, you see no reason to decide if you’re going to change it later. You’re a mischievous daredevil, which is why it’s fun to be around—fun, often scary.
2. SCORPIO
(October 23 – November 21)
The only thing predictable about you is your uncertainty. He is as devoted to luxury jets as a leaf blown by the wind of change. A shameless fan, she changes social identities like she changes clothes: New relationships, new haircuts, new job, new religion, new worldview. You often talk about wanting to live like a wandering hippo…and this is the “blueprint” for you. You don’t see the irony that you can’t really “plan” not to have plans. You need to get off that roller coaster you call life and start walking, little by little, towards the concrete goal.
3. LIBRA
(September 23 – October 22)
Dear Libra, Your scales are unbalanced; in fact, they lean strongly on the side of “flighty.” It’s not that you have a problem making decisions. You have a problem attachment with those decisions. You are reckless, aggressive, and, no, I’m not afraid to say it, sometimes you have a small frame. You don’t know what you want, and even if you did, you wouldn’t know how to get it. I don’t think the problem will solve itself, and I don’t think you have the inner focus or strength to solve it. You need to surround yourself with stable friends to slowly guide your ship to port before it sinks.
4. SAGITTARIUS
(November 22 – December 21)
He fears boredom more than death. You don’t realize that a life full of chaos can be dull and boring. It can weigh you down and make you unable to fly—which means you can’t fly, either. He hates consistency and often quotes Ralph Waldo Emerson saying “The consistency of folly is the folly of a small mind.” But misinterpret what he said—he wasn’t against consensus, only stupidity grace There’s no need to be mercurial, volatile, whimsical, haphazard, and often volatile if you don’t balance it with something else. you are smart consistency. I’m talking about things like, oh, a roof over your head. Fixed income. Loyal friends and lovers. Sure, it’s fun to go for a dip in the pool at midnight, but you’re going to drown one day if you don’t wear a life jacket.
5. LEO
(July 23 – August 22)
He has a strange but winning way of balancing flight and stability, fighting risks and rewards. You’re the type to visit the casino only when all your bills are paid—and even if you gamble, you’ll always hedge your bets. You are not against casual hookups as long as a condom is used. You would definitely prefer getting a pharmacy from a doctor over anything illegal. You’ll order that piece of coconut cake for dessert as long as you run an extra two miles in the morning. You will watch a horror movie as long as you can be assured of a happy ending. Most of the others on this list could benefit from learning how you do things.
6. AQUARIUS
(January 19 – February 18)
You have a mixed personality when it comes to volatile/stable continuity: You are stable in business decisions and total chaos in your personal life. Carefully, and with great success, you planned your education, your career and your investments. But your love life and friendships are full of instability. One side of your life is filled with IRAs, stock options, and 401(k)s; the other side is marked by rehab, restraining orders, and STD testing. You need to learn how to balance work and fun. Find that happy medium—it exists, I swear.
(April 20 – May 20)
You are stuck somewhere between flight and stability like that infamous flightless bird, the dodo. The result is that instead of sitting still or flying, you just wander around, flapping your wings useless. You don’t make sense on this list because you can’t pigeonhole. You go through long stretches of flight. Those paragraphs are, of necessity, followed by long phrases of stability. You stay stable for a long time until it gets boring, which leads to a flight path. Being flighty inevitably creates all kinds of problems, leading you to regain stability. Just when it seems like a stable and impenetrable mountain, another volcano erupts. It’s an endless loop.
8. THE STARS
(February 19 – March 20)
He is impulsive in love but otherwise stable. Almost every bad decision you’ve made in life involves romance. You won’t make a low-risk financial decision, but you’ll choose one lover after the next and dive deeper with your eyes closed every time, even though you know you’ll end up with a broken heart. It’s almost as if your heart and mind are at war. If you were single, you would be the most stable person in the world. The problem is, there is no shore.
9. ARIES
(March 21 – April 19)
He is an interesting mix of flight and stability. You grew up in chaotic conditions, and because of this, your guitar strings will always be slightly tuned. You’ll always carry a little chaos in your bones—it’s understandable and nothing to be ashamed of. But you grew up in the middle of the storm, you learned how to be the eye of that storm. You build emotional stability to deal with an unstable world. You take care of your basic needs before your basic desires. He is a living, breathing example of the triumph of order over chaos.
10. GEMINI
(May 21 – June 20)
Although twins are often locked in a life-or-death struggle that can go either way depending on the topic, this time it’s no contest—the stable Twin easily wins the match against the flighty Twin. You see the big picture and don’t focus on trivial things. You never miss the forest for the trees and are not easily distracted. You are steady, stable, strong, and reliable, you don’t like to take risks. If anything, you’re probably settling for your own good. Sometimes it pays to throw caution to the wind and roll the dice. Sometimes, just like a little spice can save a snack, taking a little risk can make you feel alive.
11. GIRL
(August 23 – September 22)
Virgos are wise in every choice they make. This is your biggest problem, which is perfectionism. You are so cautious that you don’t risk yourself. And it goes beyond risk-taking; you are a little shy about making simple decisions. You wait so long to make a stupid decision that you end up looking like a fool. You rely too much on logic and can never trust instinct. At all times, you should try to trust your gut over your brain. You won’t regret it.
12. CANCER
(June 21 – July 22)
You are a rock. Look up “rock” in the dictionary, and there’s a picture of it. Strong and tough, he is the tortoise of the Capricorn rabbit. He is the spiritual heir of Yoda and Buddha. He exudes a calm sense of calm that never comes across as arrogant or over the top. You rarely change your mind because you take your time, weigh all the options, and make the best decision the first time around. There are three certain things in life: Death, taxes, and you.
